I want to start by showing – with the use of words – how most of us study now-a-days. And just to give my readers a relatable example, I used to be at least almost this same person two years back.

Let’s call this gentleman Mr. X. X wakes up in the morning and the first thing he reaches out to, is his phone. Facebook, check. WhatsApp, check. Telegram, check. E-mails, check. And if X is a civil services aspirant, his day thus begins with a distraction. Finally, when he does sit for studying, he writes an answer on Insights Secure, but wait. Someone commented something on Disqus for his previous comment. That needs to be checked and replied to. Then two hours later, boring study feeling creeps in, and he opens the discussion at Forum IAS. Someone made a joke about something, and he laughs. His clever, witty mind thinks of an answer, and so he types it there. If he is a “real dude”, maybe he takes out time to check his Instagram and Twitter accounts too. Back to studies. But, now, what would people be thinking about what he wrote? Did they at least understand it? Idiots, they don’t get a joke, he thinks. Open Forum again. Someone said something again, he laughs or doesn’t laugh at it. Who cares!

Nobody cares. That’s the whole point of it all. There is only one thing that actually suffers in all of this : the book of X that has been lying in front of him like unrequited love, asking for some attention. Somehow, X manages to find time to study for the next two hours. But while he is studying the Aadhaar Bill, his mind is thinking about his secret crush on Facebook who just uploaded a picture. Now, he thinks about all the time wasted and to compensate for that guilt, opens a topper’s video. Aah, that motivation and that peak that will go down the drain the very next day!

If you are the male or female version of X, and you are thinking why is it that even after studying for hours, you cannot actually write well – think again. Read back up, and think again.

Two years back, Facebook used to be my companion. My phone became a reminder and a symbol of the virtual world for me. This happens with a lot of people who are holed up inside their houses or workplaces not only physically, but emotionally too. I would look at my friends having fun, some of them fulfilling their childhood dreams while I had no idea whether or not I even had one. My friends were getting married, having children, Facebook was celebrating all of that, while I was sitting, studying for an exam that seemed impossible to crack. I did not want to see all of those photos, but it was  a bad habit that slowly turned into an addiction. Every two hours, my hands would automatically move towards that blue coloured “f” on my phone or towards the green phone symbol representing WhatsApp. Failing in Prelims did not help either.

Of course, if you look at it, my friends were in a different phase of life, and all of them weren’t necessarily happy. Pretentiousness is not happiness. Facebook, obviously wasn’t celebrating anything, it was just trying to make its business grow. I gave myself multiple excuses. And I have still seen people giving all these excuses to themselves. Facebook is for information, they would say. You know, the news comes on Facebook, first? Twitter allows you to to be in touch with the government – Look, Suresh Prabhu replied to a tweet. And social media might actually reduce my stress – stress that is coming from (not) studying!

And then, one day, it all stopped. I got real with myself. I told myself that Facebook is neither for information nor knowledge, period. I downgraded from app to browser and then, one fine day, deactivated my account.

Then, I suddenly realised how I became much more focused with my studies and I took it a step forward. I withdrew from all WhatsApp groups – I said no to ALL forward messages. I downloaded an app that would allow me to lock my phone for 4 hours – 8 hours straight. I would keep my phone in the other room so that it doesn’t interfere with my studies. It took me a split second decision to turn around what I think is the most crucial part of the exam – Focus.

Since then, my mind could think of nothing else but the exam. From the time I entered in the bathroom to the time I slept at night, I could think of only the exam. If I was walking, I was thinking about democracy, and not my friend’s shoes. You know how? Because I didn’t feed my brain unwanted information. If you cannot stop yourself from eating the potato chips, don’t buy them, it is that simple.

You must remember that for most of us, preparation for Civil Services is a time when we are already feeling inadequate. We are fighting our lives, our dreams and each day, it takes a lot of courage to tell ourselves that we are strong enough. In this scenario, ten minutes of seeing a “seemingly” successful person will spoil your whole day.  That means that you don’t only waste time while you are browsing social media, but beyond that too. What good does that bring? And more importantly, why would you want to do that to yourself?

To make my point entirely clear, here is the word for this post: Delayed gratification. Long time back, there was this very famous experiment in Psychology that correlated success largely only to delayed gratification. Here is a link for the same:

Don’t eat that Marshmallow!

Internet was the greatest boon to mankind, don’t convert it into a bane.

Have the courage to plug off. Silence is good, so is a little loneliness, if you are fighting the most important battle of your life. If you want to talk, talk to someone you really love and with whom, your insecurities vanish in thin air.

Find Apps that can help you accomplish the task. Use internet to its advantage. Here is a page that can help – Click this.

Introspect. Ultimately, life is going to boil down only to what you have accomplished. This moment, next 3 days, and next one year will not matter after 20 years of your life. What will matter is the kind of person you have become over all these years. Choose to become the focused one, no matter what job you land up in. Choose to delay your gratifications.  I leave you with this lovely little poem:

“Most of us will settle for fine.
Most of us will stream mp3s instead of asking a friend to play the guitar.
Most of us will run on a treadmill at the gym instead of going to the park.
Most of us will watch 10 second videos on a computer instead of going to a play.
Most of us will eat something we can throw in the microwave instead of learning to cook.
Most of us will aspire to being known, to being famous for just a little while.
Most of us will be willing to be embarrassed, to hurt ourselves, if it means being known.
Most of us will be more concerned with that, with being known, than being remembered by anyone special.
Most of us will decide that it’s too soon or too late in life to go after what we really want.
Most of us will never actually sit down and think about what we really want.
Most of us will spend more time reading status updates than we spend reading books.
Most of us will take more pictures of ourselves than actually looking at the world around us.
Most of us will take the one unique and precious life we’ve been given and spend it being, just ok.
Most of us will make do.
And you will meet most of us and when you do, remember this.
Be the few.
Be the few.”